Anyone read The Onion?

Totally tongue-in-cheek.  Us lunch ladies get no respect.  

Two Teens Held In Lunch-Lady Mocking Incident

AUGUST 26, 1998 | ISSUE 34•04

JASPER, IN–Jasper Junior High School became the site of the nation's latest incident of teen ridicule Tuesday, when a pair of lunch ladies was brutally mocked by two students while serving breaded chicken patties and tater tots with fruit cup or raspberry-cobbler surprise. The students, eighth-graders Alex Byner, 14, and Dan Mattson, 13, have been detained for questioning. They have not yet been formally charged.

ENLARGE IMAGE

Jasper, IN, eighth-graders Alex Byner (left) and Dan Mattson are detained in connection with the brutal mocking of two cafeteria lunch ladies, including 69-year-old Agatha Klogeil (inset).

According to school officials, lunch ladies Birgit Szlach, 54, and Agatha Klogeil, 69, were ladling gravy onto the trays of Byner and Mattson when the youths opened fire with a barrage of insults, "giggling, pointing and making fake vomiting sounds clearly directed at the cafeteria employees."

"What we have here is a couple of kids looking to exploit the inherent dumpiness of school-cafeteria workers for their own humor purposes," school principal Milton Leyner said. "Trying to make themselves feel like big men by picking on the lowest of the low. It's sick, that's what it is." While most details of the mockery are still not known, it is believed that the teens focused primarily on the lunch ladies' appearance, cracking wise over their leathery skin, hideous hairnets and shapeless, mustard-yellow frocks. Particularly amusing to the teens was the German-born Szlach, who, with her squat, blockish frame and tree-trunk ankles, resembles a barn.

For the rest of the silly article, click  here.